my blog is my dirty little secret

I really need to come clean to the people in my life about my blog. I mean, I’ve always written as if everyone I know is reading – or at least like there’s a possibility they could be. It just still seems like such a strange thing – when I started blogging at thirteen, writing about your life on the internet was, well, weird. It was something no one else in my life did, and not only was it something I felt a little embarrassed about, it was also a place I could go and vent about my life without anyone I knew reading.

But now? Blogs are everywhere. No one who knows anything is under the impression that the internet is private. I just don’t know exactly how to bring it up.

I want to be a more active blogger. I don’t necessarily want to start sharing my posts on Facebook, but I’d love to link my Twitter to my blog. I’d love to be able to keep far-away friends updated on my life through my blog. I’d love to be able to share it with real-life friends who may be interested (particularly the new BRCA friends I’m meeting). I’d love to be able to run post ideas by my boyfriend or grab the laptop and write a few posts while we’re lazily watching crappy TV on a Sunday morning.

I don’t want to feel like it’s this dirty little secret. It just seems incredibly awkward to bring up out of nowhere. And it is still something I’d prefer not to share with my parents. I’d still prefer my coworkers not read it, but that’s more because I just envision them reading it in the same office as me, right in front of me, and secretly thinking I’m ridiculous. That’s what really scares me: the idea that people could read my blog and laugh at me or talk amongst themselves about how ridiculous I am for thinking I should write publicly – or for being such a nerd as to have a blog to begin with. And I don’t want prospective employers to come across it, either, and judge me by my genetic status or anxiety or anything else I may share here. I don’t want to deal with people who just don’t get the internet like I (and all of us in blog land) do.

On Friday, I’m going to happy hour with a friend of Kori’s. We connected via a Facebook group for a group we’re both part of (but that I’ve barely participated in… oops). She asked how I know Kori and after a few days I responded with, basically, “Uhh… the internet.” I think I’d tell her about my blog if it came up. Maybe it’s just something I should share with new people and wait until it comes up with everyone else?

So I don’t know. I’m curious as to others have handled this in their own lives and what your experiences have been like. I know I can’t be the only one!


5 thoughts on “my blog is my dirty little secret

  1. I initially meant for my blog to be a sort of secret. A place where I could feel free to express myself without the people I know personally analyzing every word and judging or getting offended. That basically went out the window on week two when my boyfriend caught me at it and after being royally pi@@ed that I hadn’t told him about it…promptly subscribed. Since then I’ve pretty much not kept it a secret…I sometimes post to facebook etc. And it is liberating. However, since then every post has had to be censored by me. I can no longer express my true feeling or vent about things. I can only post generalities. And still about every 5th post I get the “Is that directed at me?” questions from my boyfriend.

  2. Go for it girl! If people don’t like what you write, they don’t have to read it, right? But chances are, they might like it and then you have a new way to bring people together and share information!

  3. I feel the saaame freaking way. I put it on my Twitter profile, but I don’t have a ton of friends on Twitter, and the few on there found out about it via clicking on it in that profile. So far they have been supportive and even referenced things I blogged about in conversation! So that’s pretty cool. I definitely don’t want the people I went to high school with and am Facebook friends with reading my blog, so I keep it away from that social media forum.

    I *think* my husband has read it, but I am not sure. I think he knows how to get to it, if nothing else. I mean, my blog name is my name, so it’s not like I am trying to hide it, except like you, from my parents. I just don’t want him thinking I am ridiculous, because if he criticized my writing and ideas at all I would be crushed since his opinion mean a lot to me.I don’t want my dad commenting with a, “love you! daddy” on every single post, because Godddd, embarrassing. How could someone take me seriously then?

    Ah, I could go on forever about the merits of “coming out” vs. not, but I’ll end it here for now. 🙂 I am interested to see what others have to say on the topic!

  4. Uh, I’m kinda out. LOL

    Just slowly start adding it into twitter. And mention it casually, “Oh yeah? I read that one day before I blogged, but I couldn’t figure out anything to say about it.” Kind of a forced organic conversation, but still not, “HEY! I BLOG! WOO!”

  5. I’ve been blogging since I was 15. I started on Livejournal (like everyone else I knew) and eventually I moved to Blogger (also like everyone else, apparently I follow the crowds). At first it was just a way to get my thoughts “on paper” because I type faster than I write, and I’m always in front of a computer. Then it became a way to re-connect with my friends in far-off places, and find people with similar hobbies and interests. Pretty cool that it wasn’t my little secret place anymore. I mean, it’s not like I was putting my SSN out there… just adventures and photographs and projects. Then one day my aunt left me a comment. Whoa whoa whoa, my family!? I freaked out. I re-read every post ever (from Blogger – the Livejournal account is and will always be friends-only and no adult member of my family will ever see it!) to make sure it was family-worthy. And guess what? Everything made the grade. I talked with my aunt and realised that she, and a lot of my other family members, really appreciated my blog as a way to catch up with me from states away. Now I have it linked to Facebook and Google+ and I’m happy I do. There are still things I won’t write about on it (actually I wanted to talk to you about that separately) but overall I think that sharing my blog with my world has been a good experience.

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